If only I knew

Between the raffling trees of the forest near Vahallah village she heard a familiar, husky voice. “No! It cannot be. Etan?!” Victoria shouted in surprise, she had not seen Ethan in a while, since he left for the academy at the beginning of Fall. Victoria could no longer wait to see him, after all it is their favorite season, Summer. She ran like the wind dogging every branch leaning her way to the sound of the familiar voice. When the echoes fell silent there, he stood handsome as ever, without his shirt covering his sweat dripping wet upper body, it looked like he was working out. Ethan made a sudden turn as if he got a fright and reached out to her, his arms folding right around her fragile body. “What are you doing here Vic?” he asked a question that she clearly did not expect. Her forehead started to fold, and eyes widened like a little child who got fright but, in this case, she was not frightened, she was shocked. “The end of this Summer we are going to be together for a year, and this is how he greets me? Or maybe he was not expecting me to come running out of the woods.” She thought. Little did Victoria know what her fate would be.

Ethan said goodbye to his friends that were there and told Victoria that he would walk her home. On their way to her house in Vahallah village there was this awkward silence that could be cut through with a knife. She decided to break the silence “Did you miss me as much as I missed you?” “Of course,” he said, “I have always seen you as my sister, so yes I missed you too.” It was as if she could feel the snow in Antarctica smack over her face, she suddenly lost her cherry red cheeks and turned pale, wondering where that remark came from or maybe she just overwhelmed him. She decided to carefully slide her tiny fingers between his, made a grip and he followed. Victoria was love struck, just the way she was last Summer when she first laid eyes on Ethan as he came to live with his grandmother right after his parents died in a horrific car accident.

She could still remember feeling so guilty by the fact that felt so good around him while he was still grieving the death and sudden loss of his parents. Ethan was their only child and thus was left with nothing and nobody. The previous Summer a group of young people of the village decided to have a picnic by the river, the one where the waterfall was and the river that met with the ocean. Victoria’s parents were quite wealthy, her father and mother both were medical doctors and loving parents, they were the picture-perfect family. Her parents donated some snacks towards the picknick. As she approached the crowd, the snacks fell out of her hands, all because she saw that perfect face again, Ethan. He jogged over and helped salvage some of the snacks. His presents overwhelmed her and her hands started shaking. Ethan immediately took notice and put is hands on her’s “It was just an accident.” He said with a calm controlled voice. Immediately their eyes met as if they were written in the stars. From that moment forward they were inseparable.

Victoria and Ethan spent the entire Summer love struck and getting to know each other. She became the place where he sought refuge when the days and nights became unbearable with memories filled with heartache, sadness and loss. She taught him that it is human to be vulnerable and to want a shoulder to lean on. He taught her what it was like to have a soldier protect you with love. They spent so many days in different places discovering things around and about each other. At the river Victoria taught Ethan how to dive, and he seemed impressed with her abilities. In the forest Ethan taught her how to hunt, which was very confusing to her seeing that he is a city boy. Ethan became fiercely protective over Victoria around food because of her allergic reaction towards nuts and always made sure that he had the medicine should something slid past him, which never happened. After weeks of getting to know one another, they decided to take the next step in the relationship. The bonding also known as making love.

Since Victoria had never given her body to someone else, she was frightened at first, not of Ethan but of all the stories from other girls she heard. About Ethan no, she was certain that he was the one, her one.

On the 23rd of July, a Thursday evening, he had this romantic scene set up right along the riverside, rose petals floating on the riverbed, small white candles placed almost everywhere and a soft purple blanket. “Are you sure you still want to go through with this Vic?” Ethan asked full of concern. “Because if you should not feel that way anymore it would change nothing between us. You will always be mine now and forever.” Victoria giggled “I am certain.” As soon as she said that her doe liked eyes lured him in and the entanglement began. The following weeks went past, and they were still in love, still so young and speaking about marriage. But something about Ethan had changed. He did not seek out her hand or presence as much as he once did but always offered reassurance and told her she was imagining things that they were still the same. Victoria always knew that Ethan had big dreams of becoming a pilot and she always supported him in every way whether it was financially or otherwise. One Wednesday at the beginning of Fall they were sitting and drinking coffee on his grandmother’s porch when their conversation was interrupted by a phone call. The number was unknown, but Ethan answered the call and it was the academy for training pilots that was on the line telling Ethan he got accepted. Both of them were ecstatic but for Victoria it meant staying behind although she knew his heart’s desire. Ethan and Victoria systematically packed his bags on the day that he had to leave. As his transport cam he whispered in her ear “Remember. Always and forever”. That is what got her though when her thoughts and body lingered for him.

Sister? The comment struck Victoria as she realized she was reminiscing all the way home. Just as they were about to pass his grandmother’s house a girl with a silky red dress, long pitch-black hair and blue eyes stepped out calling Ethan. He looked at me and said he had to go and she asked him, “Ethan who is that girl?” He responded, “That is my girlfriend Elana, you and I grew apart long ago.” To Victoria this was news, but she was not going to break in front of them although her heart had already shattered into a million pieces. Now everything made sense. All the awkward looks and touches were not imagined. It was not always and forever. Putting on a brave face she looked him dead in the eye and said, “Summer was over, and so were we.”